Astrology

One of my party tricks is guessing people's star signs with astonishing accuracy. It's very easy. All you have to do is choose your target, identify a friend of your target who is likely to know such things and, when your target is out of earshot, ask the friend to tell you your target's star sign. At an opportune moment, you can then reveal to your target your talent for guessing star signs with astonishing accuracy.

"You're a Capricorn, aren't you?"

"Wow! That's amazing! How did you do that?"

"Oh, you know. There are one or two things that give it away."

Sometimes this technique works:

"When's your birthday?"

"The third of December."

"Don't tell me. You're a Sagitarius, aren't you?"

"Wow! That's amazing! How did you do that?"

"Oh, you know. There are one or two things that give it away."

Although, it's usually best to leave a gap of a month or two between "The third of December" and "Don't tell me. You're a Sagitarius, aren't you?"

So. Saturday night. A couple of girls in my company decide to try to guess my star sign.

"Gemini, isn't it?"

"No."

Recognising the opportunity, I single out the boyfriends of the aforementioned girls, and learn that they are both Cancer.

Later that evening:

"So, have you worked out my star sign yet?"

"Is it Pisces?"

"No, it's not Pisces."

"It must be Leo. You're definitely a Leo."

I can't help smirking.

"You are a Leo, aren't you."

"No, I'm not a Leo."

"Virgo?"

"Not Virgo either."

"All right, I give up. What are you then?"

"Scorpio."

I spring my party trick:

"I reckon you must be a Cancer, G. In fact, I think you're a Cancer too, N."

"Oh yeah, I know. It's so obvious, isn't it. We're both such typical Cancers, aren't we?"

????????

It's never fallen flat on me like that before.